夜深了。
你在干嘛？
穿梭在人群中？
还是一个人的在享受寂寞？

你会在这里，读我所写的一切，你应该和我一样吧。

I feel so different from my past acquaintances.
I don't club, I don't party, I seldom do booze.
I don't feel young; I feel old.
I don't go to university, and if I do, I have to pay it from my own pocket.

I feel like I have lost connection with people of my age.
The youthfulness, the fun, the laughter.
And I can't seem to find a common topic with them anymore.

Yea I should put myself out there and meet more people.
But I just wanna meet people who I want to meet, which currently, there's not many.

It's such a weird feeling.
I'm feeling so pathetic and so much like a loser, but at the same time, I know I'm not.

I think i rather meet new people and make new friends now then picking up those who reminds me of my past.
Not that I detest them.
But somehow, my life broke down at that particular period of time and since then, everything feels as if they have been cut off/terminated/stopped.
Nobody, except for those really close friends of mine, knows what exactly happened. I kind of disappeared totally back then and it's a nightmare, trust me.

And well, even if I start meeting them once again, it feels weird picking up from a point which is vague. Or should we act as if nothing happens? That ain't any better.

I doubt they remember me anyway.
Shrugs.
So stop telling me that I should reconnect with where I've dropped it.
Stop telling me to push myself out there to meet people.
It isn't of great importance to me now.

I opened a regular saving account today.
My intention -- forcing myself to save.
=)

I think i need more friends.
ha ha ha.

I have my 1st quarter of 2011 planned.
Now it's time for me to execute them.

It feels great to have my life planned out, all by myself.

It's fun planning my own overseas trip.
Kinda enjoying it although it's giving me a big headache.
argh.

And seriously.
I should start studying for my theory.
SERIOUSLY.

In the beginning of year 2011, I've ironed out and untangled thoughts that have been troubling me for years.
I'm glad that I've managed to do so.

Time to grow up, people. =)

Life has been quite hectic.
Oh not hectic.. er.. mundane?
Not exactly. Maybe, lazy?
It's a lil bit of everything.
Weather's so cold that I don't feel like moving at all. Yet I have alot to do.
So there's tons of stuff for me to do and yet, I'm not doing anything.
I need something to keep me motivated.

I think a getaway will do the job.
haha.

It's new year day!
New year eve was spent with my sor zai and his friends and good food.
Counted down alone in my room.
Slept from around 1+ to around 12 today.

A new year, a new beginning.
Gonna work really hard to achieve what i want by the end of this year.
<3